Humorous Side of Baseball, Especially Red Sox Baseball

[curiousd]

2014 is a good year to try to find humor in the game, especially for Red Sox fans. Here are a couple of examples.

 

1. If you thought the RS were bad in 2014….

 

In 1951, the St. Louis Browns lost 102 games and finished 46 games behind the pennant-winning Yankees. St. Louis was the home of the Brown Shoe Company, and some contributors here may recall the Buster Brown commercials, as do I. Of course St. Louis had the Anheuser – Busch brewery. Defiant fans coined the rallying cry “First in shoes, first in booze, last in the American League”.

 

Reference:

http://launiusr.wordpress.com/2012/04/04/five-mlb-teams-that-probably-should-have-been-in-the-minor-leagues/

 

2. Lame Excuse:

 

J.D. Drew, a great baseball talent who was probably also one of the game's great under achievers, caught a high foul fly ball with the Red Sox ahead by one run. There was less than two out.

 

The catch was an epic feat of athleticism, a catch that required Drew to stumble over bullpen mounds and scatter relievers' chairs to reach the ball. Tampa Bay had a man on third, the base runner tagged up, and of course scored the tying run. The RS eventually lost the game in 10 innings.

 

Instead of admitting he had zoned out and forgotten the game situation Drew said:

 

"I wasn't like reaching for the ball, I just kind of laid my glove there, and the ball, you know, ended up being there." When asked how he could possibly have not meant to catch the ball, Drew said “I agree completely”.

 

Source: http://sports.espn.go.com/boston/mlb/columns/story?columnist=edes_gordon&id=5508549

[Spitball]

Horrible fielding former Red Sox first baseman Dick Stuart (Dr. Strangeglove) from the early 1960s had a classic. He was with the Phillies in the mid-1960s when lefty hitting Braves' third baseman Eddie Mathews hit a vicious liner towards right field. Stuart somehow caught it. As Mathews approached first, Stuart said, "I must be slowing down, Eddie, because I used to be able to get out of the way of those."

 

Stuart was such a terrible fielder that Red Sox fans once gave him a standing ovation when he cleanly picked up a hotdog wrapper that was blowing by first base.

[Northern Star]

Horrible fielding former Red Sox first baseman Dick Stuart (Dr. Strangeglove) from the early 1960s had a classic. He was with the Phillies in the mid-1960s when lefty hitting Braves' third baseman Eddie Mathews hit a vicious liner towards right field. Stuart somehow caught it. As Mathews approached first, Stuart said, "I must be slowing down, Eddie, because I used to be able to get out of the way of those."

 

Stuart was such a terrible fielder that Red Sox fans once gave him a standing ovation when he cleanly picked up a hotdog wrapper that was blowing by first base.

 

I believe when Stuart was with the Pirates the team bus stopped outside a cement factory and they told him they were gonna get him a new glove.

[seabeachfred]

2014 is a good year to try to find humor in the game, especially for Red Sox fans. Here are a couple of examples.

 

1. If you thought the RS were bad in 2014….

 

In 1951, the St. Louis Browns lost 102 games and finished 46 games behind the pennant-winning Yankees. St. Louis was the home of the Brown Shoe Company, and some contributors here may recall the Buster Brown commercials, as do I. Of course St. Louis had the Anheuser – Busch brewery. Defiant fans coined the rallying cry “First in shoes, first in booze, last in the American League”.

 

Reference:

http://launiusr.wordpress.com/2012/04/04/five-mlb-teams-that-probably-should-have-been-in-the-minor-leagues/

 

2. Lame Excuse:

 

J.D. Drew, a great baseball talent who was probably also one of the game's great under achievers, caught a high foul fly ball with the Red Sox ahead by one run. There was less than two out.

 

The catch was an epic feat of athleticism, a catch that required Drew to stumble over bullpen mounds and scatter relievers' chairs to reach the ball. Tampa Bay had a man on third, the base runner tagged up, and of course scored the tying run. The RS eventually lost the game in 10 innings.

 

Instead of admitting he had zoned out and forgotten the game situation Drew said:

 

"I wasn't like reaching for the ball, I just kind of laid my glove there, and the ball, you know, ended up being there." When asked how he could possibly have not meant to catch the ball, Drew said “I agree completely”.

 

Source: http://sports.espn.go.com/boston/mlb/columns/story?columnist=edes_gordon&id=5508549

 

The less I think of either Drew the better off I am, but that missive about the St. Louis Browns of 1951 and Buster Brown brought back a lot of memories to this 73 and soon to be 74 year old warhorse. As bad as the Browns were that year they had a pitcher named Ned Garver who went 20-12 for the woe begotten team. That was amazing since he barely got two or three runs to work with. As for the other thing, you might remember this limerick

 

THAT'S MY DOG TIDE, HE LIVES IN A SHOE

I'M BUSTER BROWN, LOOK FOR ME IN THERE TOO.

[Northern Star]

I remember some ******* on another board claiming whatever team it was should get JD Drew. He was passionately defending him as the second coming or something. f*** outta here.

[Northern Star]

http://home.comcast.net/~massbackwards/1918.jpg

[Bellhorn04]

Funny cartoon of Drew for all his fans here. This was after the Ellsbury steal of home vs. the Yankees. Click to enlarge.

 

[jacksonianmarch]

I believe when Stuart was with the Pirates the team bus stopped outside a cement factory and they told him they were gonna get him a new glove.

 

Wasn't Stuart the guy who said he lost a grounder in the sun?

[Spitball]

Wasn't Stuart the guy who said he lost a grounder in the sun?

Haha! I am pretty sure that was Brooklyn Dodger pitcher Billy Loes. He was also a character.

[seabeachfred]

I remember some ******* on another board claiming whatever team it was should get JD Drew. He was passionately defending him as the second coming or something. f*** outta here.[/QUOte

 

Fortunately there were no posters on Bosox Board who were talking up Drew and not too many here either NS. The ones who were doing it were going at it with me, and a few others who were dead against signing the guy. In fact, if you remember, I predicted from last fall on the Red Sox would break down and sign him----with disastrous results. And that's what happened as soon as Scott Boras said "he had a three year contract on the table for Drew" trying to elicit some interest. No one bought it except Cherington who s*** in his pants and hastily signed that bum to a ten mil contract. All that did was add a total automatic out to our lineup when we had plenty of them already, completely undid Xander Bogaerts and led him down to a miserable year, and made the front office look like a pack of fools. The Drewites on this board? They all disappeared.

[seabeachfred]

Haha! I am pretty sure that was Brooklyn Dodger pitcher Billy Loes. He was also a character.

 

Loes is right. Sixth game 1952 World Series, either the sixth or seventh inning in what turned out to be a 3-2 Yankee win to even the series and set the stage for the Yanks' 4-2 win in the seventh game. In that series Brooklyn went 1-3 in games played in their home ballpark and yet won two of three at YS. That was a series the Brooklyn Dodgers should have won.

[Spitball]

This might not seem that funny, but at the time, my buddy and I laughed until tears ran down our faces. It was 1974 and the Red Sox had just brought Jim Woods in to team with Ned Martin on the radio broadcasts. It was also the year the Red Sox purchased the contract of legendary pitcher and future Hall of Famer Juan Marichal from the Giants.

 

My friend was not really familiar with National League players, so I filled him in on Juan Marichal's greatness. I was really pumped the Sox had one of the players I had long wished they would obtain. He was as legend in my book, and I may have gone a bit overboard.

 

Anyway, my buddy and I are driving down Haverhill Road in Topsfield and listing to Juan Marichal's first start with the Sox. Jim Woods is doing play by play and calls the play, "Marichal kicks and delivers. There is a long fly to centerfield! Marichal is going back to deep centerfield, and he leaps at the wall and makes an amazing catch!"

 

My buddy' looks at me with wide eyes and says, "Dammit, man! Marichal IS super human!" The problem was it was not Juan Marichal making the amazing catch but centerfielder Juan Beniquez.

[jad]

Not sure why there is such wrath directed toward J.D.Drew. He was an ok hitter (.280) signed to a surprising contract by the Dodgers, where he did EXACTLY as he should have been expected to do (rather than magically becoming as good as his contract), then with the RS, where the same thing happened: he continued to be what he always was--around .280. The RS front office and management seems to have the idea that guys they hire will somehow perform to the standard at which they are paid (e.g., Crawford or S. Drew this year); and by the same token, if they are not paid well, why then they couldn't possibly be one of the best hitters on the team (e.g., Nava last year, benched through much of the post-season, and even to some extent this year). I sincerely hope Castillo meets their strange expectations, but it will be amusing to watch, either way.

[curiousd]

Not sure why there is such wrath directed toward J.D.Drew. He was an ok hitter (.280) signed to a surprising contract by the Dodgers, where he did EXACTLY as he should have been expected to do (rather than magically becoming as good as his contract), then with the RS, where the same thing happened: he continued to be what he always was--around .280. The RS front office and management seems to have the idea that guys they hire will somehow perform to the standard at which they are paid (e.g., Crawford or S. Drew this year); and by the same token, if they are not paid well, why then they couldn't possibly be one of the best hitters on the team (e.g., Nava last year, benched through much of the post-season, and even to some extent this year). I sincerely hope Castillo meets their strange expectations, but it will be amusing to watch, either way.

 

JAD brings up the point that in modern (post Curt Flood) baseball especially, players may not play up to the standard at which they are paid. So consider:

 

Good players born too soon

 

 

The only bright spot for the 1951 Browns, who finished in last place, 102 games behind the Yankees, was the pitching of Ned Garver, who went 20-12 for a team that won only fifty-two games. In addition, Garver was the leading hitter on the club, posting a B.A. in 1951 of .351. (This was, of course, long before the DH). During the next spring when Garver negotiated for a salary hike, owner Bill Veeck pointed out to Garver, “We could have finished last without you!”

 

The 1952 Pttsburgh Pirates lost 112 games, the worst record of any major league team since 1935. Home attendance dropped by about one-third. The Pirate's Ralph Kiner, however, led the league in home runs with 37. Despite Kiner's league-leading home-run performance, Branch Rickey outdid what Bill Veeck argued with Garver and Rickey actually cut Kiner’s salary.

 

When Kiner objected, Rickey told him, "We can finish last without you."

 

References include the URL :

sabr.org/bioproj/person/b65aaec9

Edited September 29, 2014 by curiousd

[curiousd]

A Ned Garver Quote

 

“Our fans never booed us,” said Browns pitcher Ned Garver. “They wouldn’t dare. – We outnumbered them."

 

Reference: http://boatagainstthecurrent.blogspot.com/2009/09/quote-of-day-ned-garver-on-why-his.html

[Spitball]

During Game 4 of the 2004 World Series, Manny Ramirez got into an argument with Cardinals catcher Yadier Molina. Molina was accusing Manny of stealing the Cardinals’ signs.

 

Francona came out of the dugout to keep Manny from getting into trouble. He said to the plate umpire Chuck Meriweather, “Chuck, Manny doesn’t even know our signs.”

 

Francona turned to Manny and asked, “You don’t know our signs, do you, Manny?”

 

Manny replied, sheepishly, “No.”

[Spudboy]

During Game 4 of the 2004 World Series, Manny Ramirez got into an argument with Cardinals catcher Yadier Molina. Molina was accusing Manny of stealing the Cardinals’ signs.

 

Francona came out of the dugout to keep Manny from getting into trouble. He said to the plate umpire Chuck Meriweather, “Chuck, Manny doesn’t even know our signs.”

 

Francona turned to Manny and asked, “You don’t know our signs, do you, Manny?”

 

Manny replied, sheepishly, “No.”

 

Hahahahahhahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! That's Manny!

 

The guy did not even know which knee was hurting!!!! Stupido!

[curiousd]

Should Francona have used number one and number two cards in 2011?

 

During the great "Should Josh Beckett have been allowed to leave the dugout and eat fried chicken " debate, Jack McKeon, who had been Beckett's manager on the Marlins, stated that after chasing Beckett out of the clubhouse with a bat, he then made a rule that anyone who needed to use the clubhouse would need "poo-poo cards and pee-pee cards" . Needing permission to leave the dugout prevented any sneaking off.

 

Writer Ian Casselberry pointed out that all this begs the question, "When Francona found out about McKeon's innovation do you suppose he thought:

 

"Poo-poo and pee-pee cards. Man, why didn't I think of that?""

Edited October 1, 2014 by curiousd
improving my grammar

[Northern Star]

My favorite Jack McKeon moment was when he said "I'm not a miracle worker" when he became the Marlins' manager - and then the team went on to win the World Series.

[curiousd]

Horrible fielding former Red Sox first baseman Dick Stuart (Dr. Strangeglove) from the early 1960s had a classic. He was with the Phillies in the mid-1960s when lefty hitting Braves' third baseman Eddie Mathews hit a vicious liner towards right field. Stuart somehow caught it. As Mathews approached first, Stuart said, "I must be slowing down, Eddie, because I used to be able to get out of the way of those."

 

Stuart was such a terrible fielder that Red Sox fans once gave him a standing ovation when he cleanly picked up a hotdog wrapper that was blowing by first base.

 

Butch Hobson was probably a worse fielder than Stewart but had an injury related excuse

 

He had football injuries from his college career at Alabama and played in 1978 with bone chips in his elbow.

 

From the compendium "Baseball's Worst Players":

 

"Playing for Boston in the late 1970s, Hobson hit for power but often more than negated the home runs with terrible defense. In 1978, he committed 43 errors at third base, making him the first player in over half a century to post a fielding percentage —.899—below .900. And yet somehow, according to advanced statistics, that wasn't even Hobson's worst defensive year. In 1981, his only season with the Angels, Hobson committed 17 errors in 83 games and demonstrated what might be described as negative range."

 

"Hobson contributed a gem to the genre of minor league manager ejection videos. As manager of the Nashua Sounds, he pulled out the first base bag, carried it into the stands, and handed it to a little boy."

 

Edited October 1, 2014 by curiousd

[curiousd]

Kevin Millar tries deer pee on his bat

 

While a member of the Florida Marlins, Millar put female deer urine on his bat in hopes this would help his hitting for opening day against Montreal in 2002. He told reporters that if he got hits on opening day he would continue to use the deer urine. But the odor seeped into his batting gloves and made his hands smell. "You go up to wipe your nose, you know, and it smelled so bad" Millar told the Miami Herald. "Maybe I put too much on."

 

Reference: The Baseball Hall of Shame by Bruce Nash and Allen Zullo