5GoldGlovesOF,75

It's perfect that he'll be able to rest his arm for the entire first half of the season, while a rotation as deep as his ankles in low tide burns out another undermanned bullpen. Then he'll come back from major surgery better than ever without question and throw perfect games into November.

The past few hours -- after been focused more on Red Stripe than Red Sox -- I realize I need to apologize to the board for my emotionally enlarged upper case fonts. And to Breslow and Kennedy, who are doing the best they can working for an owner who is obviously no longer all-in for the fans of Red Sox Nation. So: gotta credit guys like Bloom and Brez, who are too smart not to know what was in store for them as CBOs... the rehabbing bin pitchers may suck, but not always, and Bloom and Brez probably enjoy doing thousand-piece Red Sox puzzles every winter, even knowing there are always going to be four or five pieces lost in couch cushions or under rugs forever (or until they move to new cities). Sammy -- it may eat you up inside to have to constantly lie, but we do realize that all presidents lie (some all the time). And if we're being honest, most of us typists would probably do it, too, and not turn down the job if offered... not so much for the salary, but just for the free tix and special seats every night. Go, Red Stripe!

How can anyone criticize this offseason, after Sam Kennedy assured all: "There is an extreme urgency for a deep postseason run in 2025 without question. EVEN IF IT TAKES US OVER THE CBT." Sandoval may have a broken wing, but there is so much urgency that this signing had to be for 2025 without question. The president told us so. It may be tempting to ask Kennedy to please remove his size Sam from his big mouth (because in Boston, CBT stands for Closed Budget Today). But Red Sox free agent signings this entire decade are from a special sign language to fans... ... the sign of holding up one finger (it doesn't mean We're #1).

Plan G (this year's Giolito) -- except he's already rehabbed goods. If it ain't broke, don't Red Sox it.

No one knows if Patrick will be any good when/if he comes back from Tommy John this season, but my favorite part of this contract is that the Red Sox will be paying him over twice as much in 2026, no matter what.

He'll be better than Sam Kennedy will be at the trade deadline, when Sam explains why they didn't recruit any actual talent for another stretch run (when they stretch out on lounge chairs to watch the playoffs).

Cut Brez some slacker. Patrick is under 30, a veteran of teams that stink, and just two years ago led the AL in shutout (1). And on bb-ref, two of his Most Similar Pitchers are Boggs and Kingman (tommy, brian).

We think we need more strikeout pitchers, so we won't have to think why we're still watching infielders field weak contact and play soccer, hackey sack and jai-alai with the horsehide.

I was going to type my disgust, but my pride as a fan will be on the IL until mid-summer, when I'll really be disgusted. Well, as far as Sandovals go, this is actually a bargain for Boston. The Red Sox are only paying Patrick $18 million not to pitch for them. Remember, they chose to pay Pablo $48 million not to play for them for three years.

While both teams seem interested in upgrading every offseason, only one ever does more with its payroll than fantasize: the one that's virtually always a contender, and never tanks for the memories.

If the M's were the Cubs, they'd pay the Yankees to take him.

Except that ex-front office exec who recently said Mookie would have signed in Boston didn't have to change his name, move to the southwest, grow a stash, and take a Cinnabon job at some mall.

Soto was never Plan A (more like C, as in Let's C what happens). For this org, Crochet for prospects was always Plan A. Most real contenders would rather just pay market value for the free agents they need, instead of giving up actual players -- but not the Red Ink Sox. Breslow bypassing Tanner Scott, this winter's marquee lefty reliever, and going right after past-his-prime Chapman says the bullpen was also part of Plan C. Fried and Teoscar were probably Plan B, but once their sticker prices soared, the front office most likely sent all the VPs home for the holidays. They know when they get back to work, it won't take much to go to Plan G: just get another Giolito.

No Scrooge for you! (editing headline for veracity): Red Sox Among Stunt-Runners to Sign Soto Red Sox Among Punt-Kickers to Sign Anyone Else of Interest

Agreed - those gondola boats could be dangerous for a pitcher; Roki could hurt his rotator cuff manning the long-handled oar... unless, he hires a gondolier to do the rowing.

Internet reports Roki's entourage is already scouting out apartments in key neighborhoods... Mission Beach, La Jolla, Beverly Hills, Venice... (are we still on the internet?)

Spending not on S.O.X

We three jesters Despite these forum suggesters Are no longer Sox investors So give up, you protestors (O, deep in my pocket I know that I do bereave We shall overpay, someday)

If Cora knew you personally, he'd call you a good kid (even if he's decades younger).

Maybe that's Sam's urgency, and maybe why Brez keeps talking up Raffy at 3B -- to hint that guys like Bregman and Arenado aren't happening... hopefully, because the remaining budget will be devoted to PITCHING.

Well, we know this CBO isn't unconscious -- he's so excited for Raffy to be playing third base.

It's unconscionable if they don't. Real contenders constantly recruit established relievers every winter. Some are recycled, and all are susceptible to injury and thus, on-and-off again good/bad seasons. But the value of bullpen talent (not minor league arms cut from other rosters) is never ignored... by the good teams.

Even if they sign Buehler and a bat, we're all overlooking the same problem that comes every single summer of this decade: when the rotation breaks down like it always does, the bullpen gets burned out, and by August the whole pitching staff is in tatters. And they never have enough to hang in there for a stretch run. Sure, a tighter defense keeps the pitch counts down, and a blaster offense can help compensate. But we know, the players know, and the frigging front office knows they need more established arms, and way more durable depth in the bullpen. And as we see every summer, waiting until the end of July is too late for this org to add any pitcher of significance.

Only 13 more days until next year. This offseason, with Sam Kennedy and his front office displaying "extreme urgency to compete for the American League East championship and to set ourselves up for a deep postseason run in 2025 without question"... the Red Sox: 1. lost a starting pitcher and replaced him with a better one; 2. lost both a closer and set-up man in their late-30s, and replaced them with two others in their late-30s; 3. lost the back-up catcher and replaced him with a minor leaguer; 4. lost the team home run leader and right-handed swinging middle order bat... and did not replace him with anyone. In a Sirius interview yesterday, Breslow repeated how "excited" they are to have Rafael Devers as the third baseman -- because they hired some new coaches. Management understands that fans demand World Series rings every season, but please... stop asking so many urgent questions!

Whoosh... ssssssssand! Klop-klop thud.