You left out the part where you win the lottery, Jessica Biel calls you up and proposes marriage, you both strike oil on your honeymoon, and Netflix writes you a blank check for the rights to your life story.
The Blue Jays didn’t release Tulowitzki because there was a slim chance he would return to prime form. They released him because they felt the chances of his contributing at all were somewhere in between microscopic and non-existent. They decided that paying $19.45 million to give his spot on the 40 man roster to some aging journeyman on a minor league deal seemed like a better allocation of resources.
It’s worthwhile for the Yankees to give him a shot because they can cut him before the season and only have to pay his travel expenses to Florida. But I think we all know how this is going to play out.
Meanwhile, out here in Chicago, Ronald Torreyes is screaming “WHAT THE #%%#€?!!!”