Youk Of The Nation

And meanwhile I have no job and no girlfriend. The universe is entirely unfair. I need a relationship and a paycheck or I'm going to start robbing banks.

Speaking of which, where has Spud been?

And 6 years before I was.

By the way, a note to all of you out there (you know who you are). This is how to make a post with a picture and nothing else, and still be funny.

I don't know enough about the farm system to have an opinion on that, but isn't it possible to get one of them without giving up one of those four specific players? Between guys who have been producing surprisingly well, like Nava, and guys like Kalish, plus the dozens of other players in the Minor League system, isn't there any combination the Sox can put together to get a pitcher? Especially if they include cash or eat the rest of someone's contract? I mean, Milwaukee seems like they'd be easy to fleece for Grienke, and as for Garza, well, I'm sure the grounds crew at Wrigley would help the FO pack his bags.

I thought Padilla was Venezuelan.

What are his splits when your foot falls asleep?

Pipette is 6-0!

So skimming the last couple pages, I see we're calling him Machete Padilla now?

I thought Dale Sveum was managing the Cubs now?

Word of the day calendar?

They weren't booing, they were Youking.

He was bald in Home Alone, unless you count the ski cap that was partially melted to his head by a blowtorch.

Please just win.

Also, enough with the vomit-names. Pukington isn't even a pun, it's just stupid.

Yeah, just the other day I was watching an interview where Albert Pujols was talking about how difficult it is to focus on baseball while dealing with an abusive stepfather and keeping his grades up for college applications. Seriously, do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds? Coaching anyone who is not an MLB player gives you as much experience and right to psychoanalyze pros as I have. That is to say none. I have a 'half dozen' years of experience in a few things, notably working in and managing chain restaurants. (I was a GM at a Blimpies for a little over a year and a half and have been a Shift Manager at several other places over the years), but I wouldn't begin to tell someone else who has been doing the job on the highest available level, say, the manager of an exclusive Los Angeles restaurant, what he was doing wrong, and I certainly wouldn't do it to someone doing the job on the highest level by assuring people around me that I know exactly what their problem is. Your experience is great, glad you got to work with baseball. But someone who spent 30 years coaching high school and college baseball (obviously not elite colleges, or I'm sure we'd hear it from you. Community College? Were any of the teams you coached in the NCAA?) has zero of the necessary credentials to tell us that they know exactly what is going on inside a player or managers head, or how to fix it. Psychiatry and psychology are inexact sciences at the best of times, though getting better through science, and psychiatry from a non-psychiatrist in this situation is laughable. You sound like a man who spends his free time in 3-D flight simulators bragging to everyone that he knows how to fly a plane.

Angel hair.

If the Sox lose it will be because of comprimised GT-starter mojo two days in a row.

Well. Pasta Mojo was in effect tonight, for all the good it did.

Hm, I thought he played SS, 2B, and 3B at some point. Oh well. And yeah, Cora. That guy was great. No pop, but defensively solid. I still remember the home run he hit to right field, five feet in front of the fence that bounced off of Alex Rios' glove into the bullpen. He also had that epic at-bat against Matt Clement when they were both in the NL. What was it, 19 or 20 pitches? Ended up with a HR.