Okay, last night convinced me we need Clemens in pinstripes.
I know it will be expensive, but I've come up with some ways to pay for his contract.
1) Sell Lower Manhattan
2) Sell Torre's green tea supply, make him buy the generic stuff.
3) Place seats on the facade and big bat (putting seats on the stadium trademark worked for Boston.)
4) On off days, rent out players to small market, college, high school, and little league teams. (With Johnny in center, it will be the first time a kid has scored from first in tee-ball.)
5) Demote Jaret Wright to the new Z affiliate: Baghdad Bombers. If he doesn't, uh, dissapear after a while...start paying him in Iraqi dollars.
I'm not sure how we'd pay for the other 2/3rds of the contract, but I'm sure Cashman will find a way.