Part IV: Who would you take?

[Youk Of The Nation]

It is the bottom of the ninth, the bases are loaded, and there are two outs. You are the visiting team, it is Game Seven of the World Series. You are winning, 5-4. The other team's dead pull-hitting number six batter laces a line drive into right field. It is sinking fast and tailing towards foul ground but there is a good chance it will land fair, winning the game, if your right fielder does not catch it. Now, who do you want in right field attempting to make that play?

A: Bobby Abreu
B: A cocker-spaniel/Irish terrier mix with a baseball glove tied to the top of it's head
C: A pile of rocks cleverly arranged to look like Ted Williams
D: Jeffrey Maier, blindfolded and hopped up on Vicodin and Pop-Rocks

[example1]

Jesus, that's a tough one. Is the baseball glove on the Cocker-Spaniel/Terrier-mix's head a left or right paw'd glove?

[Coco's Disciples]

I'm taking the rocks. They've been with me all season, I gotta stick with my guns.

[See Red]

Jesus, that's a tough one. Is the baseball glove on the Cocker-Spaniel/Terrier-mix's head a left or right paw'd glove?

... does it matter?

I take the dog eleven times out of ten.

[Gom]

I choose option E:

Jose Canseco, post- steroids.

Did I win?

[jacksonianmarch]

If you are on vicodin, you arent hopped up at all.

[Youk Of The Nation]

If you are on vicodin, you arent hopped up at all.

I take it all the time, and let me tell you, though I may not be hyperactive or anything of the sort, 'hopped up' definitely describes it.

[Mr Crunchy]

depends on the mood doc
if you like vicodin and theyre part of your daily diet you get energy if you pop a few
if you dont and are hooked.....well you know about opiate withdrawals

i take jeff meier
hes got an impeccable track record of success

[YAZMAN]

i take jeff meier
hes got an impeccable track record of success

I'd substitute Mikey the Life cereal kid for Meier, keeping the Pop Rocks but substituting Coke for the Vicodin.

[Mr Crunchy]

vicodin
it isnt just for breakfast