Technically I think the San Diego team moniker refers to a priest or chaplain. Or, given the old logo, possibly a monk.
There is no way you remember Steve Garvey (former Padre first baseman who had a scandal with some illegitimate children with multiple mothers. These events lead to a popular bumper sticker that read “Steve Garvey is not my Padre”).
Why do I remember shit like this?
Also for the record, “Pittsburgh River Ruffians” EXACTLY captures the spirit that leads to team names like “Trash Pandas”.
Maximum points awarded there...
Been a while since I checked out minor league team names. I just looked at the listings to pick out some bad ones.
Winston-Salem Dash
Kannapolis Cannon Ballers (shouldn't it be Kannon? Come on, guys)
Great Falls Voyagers
Akron RubberDucks - maybe the worst of them all, and I'm not even 1/4 of the way through the listings.
Rocket City Trash Pandas - that's what we all do. Worst contract ever.
Stockton Ports - as in a physical port? Or the wine? Either is dumb.
Northwest Arkansas Naturals - yeah, OK, I get the reference, but Unnaturals would be cooler.
West Virginia Power - they probably get a ton of calls from people disputing their utility bill.
Rocky Mountain Vibes
Amarillo Sod Poodles - not even gonna check if that's a real thing.
Cardinals are pretty lame as well.
Memphis Redbirds (AAA) Roster
Springfield Cardinals (AA) Roster
Palm Beach Cardinals (A Adv.) Roster
Peoria Chiefs (A) Roster
State College Spikes (SS) Roster
Johnson City Cardinals (R) Roster
DSL Cardinals Blue (R) Roster
DSL Cardinals Red (R) Roster
GCL Cardinals (R) Roster