Yesterday the boys in Red were defeated by the Green Team with a little help from Wake"up it's groundhog day over and over again"field and HEY HEY HEY Fat Albers. Time to send the most unimaginatively named team back to their gang riddled shithole of Oakland, and provide the great folks of New England with a little comfort before Hurricane Irene comes in and bends us all over like a cheap bay area prostitute.

Let's do this. Game 1, Noon time baby. Show no mercy. Spare no life. Spank dat ass.

Jon Lester The Lineup Molester vs. Guillermo "my last name sounds like a spanish slang term for an STD" Moscoso